Take an honest second and think back, how many of you have heard this in your own head? Not spoken externally, but said internally to yourself? “Worthless, Unaccomplished, you will never do anything right, you can’t, you are just a failure.” How many of you have had these same words or phrases echo in the depths of your minds? Here is an even harder question for you, how many of you accept them temporarily? How many of you try and use these negativities to spark motivation and propel you into your awaiting accomplishments? Be honest, many of us have tried to use that negative energy to piss ourselves off even more and spark a change. Sure you get hyped up and you may come out the gates blazing. Yet, with that initial rush, it is so short lived, and that negative talk with yourself has only reverted back and created questions. After your spark, you have now regressed, and become demotivated, frustrated, and fatigued. The crazy thing is that the intentions behind this were true and positive, but the content is still based in a negative state; which will only breed more negativity. We have a language, a form of communication, we have words, phrases, sentences, which are all lit by emotion and context. What we say to ourselves and to others are actually one in the same, they have a direct effect all the same. When we converse this way, in a negative state with ourselves, we have entered a new dialect. This sub language can create such a disruption to our normal conversations, that our understanding becomes void, and we lose sight of our inner voice, our reasoning, our connection with our self worth. We lose our value in ourselves.
“Loving or hating the life you are living is solely all in your repeated
self-talk.”
Having a good self talk and defying “the noise” is about uplifting yourself to where you can tackle any challenge, any obstacle, even when that is your own battle of worth and honesty. Having the ability to turn down the noise and silence the negative badgering allows us to truly hear our inner voice. We connect with our internal workings, and establish a trust with ourselves. A trust that we can be there for ourselves just as much as we can cut ourselves down.
We have focused a lot before on self accountability, and holding ourselves responsible. Well, what about the accountability and responsibility that comes with caring for our mindset, our self worth, and how we value ourselves. We can be concerned all day long about what she thinks, or what he says, or what they all assume. What should matter the most is how we feel about ourselves and how we speak of our self and to our self. Having a good relationship with yourself, with your mind, is just as important as your external relationships. Have you noticed it is easier to speak of others, than it is of yourself? If this is the case, then you should work to better your communication with yourself. To another point, what is this crap with holding back and checking ourselves? Why do we micromanage our actions because of what others might think or say. Why do you hold yourself hostage essentially? What I mean is, we immediately go into a hostage standoff with our mind/ourselves, in certain situations. It’s like playing the “hokie pokie” with your true self. Let a little out, then hold back, let a little out, then hold back again. It isn’t a dare to be who you are, nor should it be a fear to be who you are and act the way you feel. This is another area where self talk can be a catalyst to you building a comfort with who you are. I am not going to blame society here, or your environment; a choice was made, and it is on you. You have every right, and capability to love yourself, to build a reputation with yourself, to talk and speak and respond to yourself with positive aspects. It is solely on your shoulders to carry the weight of your world, or the weight of others worlds on your world, on your shoulders.
Sounds a little ridiculous doesn’t it, but how many of us do it? See the real mind bender here is, it's much easier to be a nice person and let others speak highly of you to boost your impressions of yourself. Than it is to sit down, look in the mirror, and tell yourself why you are good enough and that who you are is all you need. What, you think that is arrogance, being conceded, self centered? I call bullshit, fuck that noise too! That is called self assurance, and self worth, it is confidence and character; it is you believing in YOU! Is it so hard that we cannot find these attributes in ourselves, and that we try to seek out what we already know, elsewhere? Why be deceptive to ourselves? Who are we fooling here? The sad thing is, everyone, but they aren’t the ones hurt in the end, we will be. They can all walk away from this, but you, you are stuck with it. So, sit down, close your eyes, tune out the bullshit, and the noise; and speak. Talk to yourself, listen to yourself, build that connection, establish that foundation of self, and get rooted.
“You can fool the whole world down the pathway of years.
Get pats on the back as you pass,
but your final reward will be heartaches and tears.
If you cheated the guy in the glass.”
Here is a challenge for everyone that reads this. Take some time, take a moment, and make an observation of your thoughts. Take notice of your inner dialogue. See if you find yourself speaking negatively of yourself, or to yourself. When you hear that little voice in your head spitting off at that negative and self degrading bullshit, STOP IT. Just stop, tell yourself enough is enough. Remember, “fuck that noise!” Replace that negative moment with a positive something. Break that cycle and relieve your subconscious mind from its constant badgering, and take control. Do something positive for yourself and root those feet in your stance. We talk about taking stances and fighting for this cause and that cause, for this good and that benefit. How about we take the fight, the good doing, and the benefit back home to ourselves for once. We cannot elevate and we cannot encourage change, or embody a state of self empowerment, if we cannot strengthen and change our own self. Better yet, improve our own self. Leading by example starts by being an example. Start being an example by being exactly who you are, being happy with who you are and reminding yourself that you are enough. Tuning out the noise and having positive dialogues inside will grow your ability to think, act and react with a positive mindset.
“The way you choose to think and speak about yourself (to yourself)
IS A CHOICE. You may have spent your whole life talking about
yourself in a negative way. Thinking of yourself in a negative way,
reacting and acting of yourself in a negative way. This does not mean
that you have to continue that path.”
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