How to Develop Your Self-Trust November 10, 2019 19:30
"As soon as you trust yourself, you will know how to live" Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
Do you trust yourself? Most of us don't ask that question too often as we naturally tend to think that we all do. What many of us don't realize is that your level of self-trust can be different about different things. You may trust your instincts and yourself in some things, like driving your car or caring for pets, for example. But what about when it comes to making big commitments or decisions? Do you trust your intuition and reasoning to make decisions that are actually yours and make YOU happy and not someone else? If somewhere along your journey you made a couple mistakes by relying on your inner voice, it is only natural you may start doubting your judgement. Maybe you start to rely on you partner or family to take care of you needs and safety because they "know better." It is always easier to give someone else key to our well being; that way in case everything goes wrong we have someone else to blame for the failure.
In reality, if you don't trust yourself you can never live an epic life. You will always be looking for validation from others for every step you take and feel judged and pressured to stop anytime someone tells you you will fail. Not trusting yourself makes you doubt your dreams and ability to achieve them.
Self-trust is not a superpower that some of us have and some don't. It is a personality trait that can be developed with a little bit work and a small shift in your mindset.
Rely on yourself for validation
To develop self-trust, first and foremost, stop caring about the opinions of others. This is your life, your dreams and only you can have a final say in anything that concerns you. Distance ourselves from people who undermine your self-trust. Some people push your pain buttons because is helps them feel like they are in control of your life. Don't give them that pleasure! Look inside yourself for validation. All you need to keep pushing through your goals is already there.
Be kind to yourself
You are human, it's OK to make mistakes. You are entitled to missteps and occasional screw-ups. What's not OK is to let your past define your present and your future. You made those mistakes to become wiser and stronger, acknowledge that, learn from it and move on.
Foster internal dialogue
How often do you listen to your inner voice that's asking for time alone in silence? We get it, between work and other million commitments it is hard to find time to attend to your needs. It is important, however, that you listen to what your intuition tells you. Encouraging an inner dialogue will help you be more in tune with yourself and your wants and desires. Ask yourself how you are feeling more often and make sure you listen to your responses. Once you learn how to hear yourself out, trusting will become easy.
Get honest with yourself
Are you in denial of certain issues? Honesty is fundamental to any relationship, including your relationship with yourself. If you are dishonest with yourself about anything, there is no way for you to develop real self-trust. So go ahead and get real; you've got nothing to fear, the only person who is listening is you.